To try something new? That sounds like going back to Germany is definitely not an option then, because it's not really "something new" ;)

But I get what you mean! :)

I don't mind risking something, but I just don't see the point at the moment.
I really, really wanted to go to Japan so badly no matter what. I didn't care about what kind of job I got and where in Japan as long as I could go. I wasn't anxious at all.

This time I have absolutely no drive, motivation and nothing I want, so it's REALLY hard to risk something.