Oh no, you're fine.
What I mean is to wait until this trip before making any final decision. Because now you may be thinking it's best to leave Japan, but then you go home, something happens, and your passion is renewed. I don't mean wait more years or anything. Because right now, you can't decide anything, as you said. This trip might be just what is needed to help you make up your mind. It's not smart to keep putting the decision off, but it's even less smart to leave when you aren't 100% sure of your next move.